The anchor

When the unspeakable happens we are given an anchor, it’s so big and heavy we can’t move, our body aches and we just wonder how can we even move ever again. We sit still, immobilized, but there are many dear friends around us helping us to lift that enormous anchor. We try everyday to lift it, we get stronger every time we try. Some days we are like the top athletes training for the olympics, some days we just sit there and stare at the anchor fantasizing about its sudden disappearance. We remember how it felt, but we never felt the joy as intensely as we fell the pain.
To people around us we look so ripped these days, but to tell you the secret, we found this great web site, the body suits are custom made and you can request some pretty weird shit, it’s the internet after all. Like who would want Madonna’s arms these days, like seriously…
So everyday we put on our suits, inflate the specific parts with air and we look perfectly ready to carry our anchors. Beneath the suit our wimpy muscles hurt like hell and our heart is ready for the heart attack from the enormous strain.
To our surrounding we appear fine, our social norm dictates that the only acceptable answer to the “How are you?” question is FINE, THANK YOU. But we are not fine, the anchor so awkwardly placed around our necks is really starting to distort our spine, we can no longer stand up strait with chin raised high. I tried to lift my chin three weeks ago, but that jerk Reality showed up and really yanked on the anchor chain, I almost felt like I will be paralyzed from neck down for the rest of my life.
When we come home each night we carefully undress, exposing our bruised bodies, we look at each other, hug and cry. We try to help each other to carry the anchor, we’ve tried putting them together, they do appear lighter that way, but the problem comes with synchronizing our steps, so fry we trip too frequently to make this efficient, but hey Rome wasn’t built in a day.
So to all our wonderful friends, we love you guys, we can’t make it without you. We also feel like we are an added burden to your already packed lives and we feel extremely awkward about that.
But we need you, because the fall is coming, it will be quarter of a year without our Sara and Halloween and Christmas are coming. We are trying to figure out our new holiday traditions. But even as I just sit here and type this I feel the anchor doubling in size.
Ok, I will go and put on my strong suit, because my brain is pretty willing to accept the deception of perceived strength, I bet it’s some self preservation technique I haven’t read about yet.
At least it’s a beautiful sunny day outside.